18. Gone
5 years. 5 years ago. The night that changed everything. I remember some of it. It was an unusual occasion. My youngest half brother and I singing together at…
17. BREAKING THE CHAINS
Before I even open my eyes, I hear the sounds of nature coming to life all around me. Unfamiliar chirps and buzzing. Tickling my brain. As the first light of…
16. Two Roads, part 2
I hate birthdays There, I said it. Let me be a bit more specific. I’m not talking about the presents, balloons, or cake. I'm referring to the build up, the…
15. Two Roads, part 1
Trigger Warning: This blog contains sensitive material not suitable for children, including descriptions of physical abuse and sexual assault. Reader discretion advised. April 23, 1979 From inside the bathroom stall,…
14. Befriending Me
Tattered pink dress. Tangled hair. Dirty fingers. In my mind's eye, I see a little girl. She is standing alone, nose pressed against the window of an imaginary cafe. …
13. This Is Recovery
Before I started healing from my complex PTSD, I began each new year with just one thing on my mind, fat. After weeks of holiday overindulgence, I would stand on the…
12. Recover Your Joy
The little girl that wore pink dresses and loved ballet had a filthy mouth. That girl was me. The glow of the Christmas show was long gone. Nothing…
11. What Lies Ahead
I used to see myself as a one trick pony. The singer. My job was to perform and look pretty. Wear the costume. Shake your ass. Smile, repeat.…
10. I Choose Joy
There are times I think I know what I’m doing in life. I feel confident. On top of things . “I’ve got this.” I say to myself . This…
9. Dreams
It’s too early to be awake. Yet here I am in the darkness at 3 am, reclining and crying in my husband's favorite chair. I didn’t know your middle…